Coming back to school, though, any sort of routine disappears until classes start. I was doing fine the weekend I moved in but going into Monday I was super anxious and didn't know why. It got better by Wednesday but I was still struggling. I was working on some PR things for KD in the evening after Spirit Week and when I finished them up I went home to reflect on what was wrong.
It was the first time it really hit me that Allyson Penner and David wouldn't be back on campus "permanently." Obviously, I'll still see them and we will visit each other, but they won't just be a two minute walk away.
I think it was so hard because Allyson has been there for me at all times from the beginning of my freshman year. This past spring specifically there were so many times where we'd sit in David and Matthew's room talking about everything and anything while they played video games. I miss that a lot. Allyson is the most down to earth and passionate person I've ever met. She is ALWAYS willing to listen and she helped me so many times by just talking out my problems with me. She doesn't judge you and she is able to put aside her opinions to offer the best advice for you. So Allyson, if you're reading this I love you more than I could ever possibly express. I am so grateful for our friendship and you will always be a huge inspiration to me.I knew long distance would be hard but honestly it wasn't hard over summer. Selfishly, it helped knowing that a lot of people were in their hometowns and away from their significant other. But coming back and seeing everyone together again mad me sad. David, however, is the best and reminded me that it wasn't like we were never going to see each other. He visited this past weekend and it seriously made everything better. Then I'll see him again for Labor Day weekend. He also plans on visiting again in September. We'll still see each other a good amount and that makes me happy.
What I've learned from this week is that my routine is going to be different this year. It's not just my class and work schedule, I won't spend every moment in Sigma Pi hanging out with David, Allyson and Matthew. But I've also learned that it's going to be okay. Just because life is a little different doesn't mean it's bad. I'm still going to miss them more than anything, but I also know that it's going to be okay.
Okay honestly this post was kind of a mess but I wanted to share how I was feeling because life isn't always perfect. As the semester begins I know I will get into a new routine which will ease some of my anxiety. I still love Drury and I still have so many people here, it's just adjusting to two of the biggest people in my life being away.
Thank you for listening to my ramble and I hope to be back with new content soon.
Until next time,
Taylor xx
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